'Killer Within' - The Walking Dead, Season Three

The Walking Dead

Season Three

Episode Four

'Killer Within' - 10.0

Hello doors. I love you doors. And Carol's apparently indicative head scarf. 

Well, where can I possibly begin?

How about a simile?

Watching 'Killer Within' was akin to walking through a pleasant, flowery field full of butterflies and chirping birds who flutter gracefully atop the tree line which frames the sun as it slowly descends beyond the green horizon. Possibly with some relaxing classical music playing all the while as well.

Then, when darkness falls a few seconds later, you fall down a three storey mine shaft into the decrepit lair of a six-legged, conjoined horror of a fuck-monster who wants nothing more than to repeatedly violate your paralysed corpse with its seventeen penises, before throwing you back into the cold, wet world outside (it's been raining during the rape) to painfully drag yourself home to find that your mother's DVR'd your experience so you can't tell what happens until after she's watched it for herself.

FUCK YOU MUM. THIS IS WHY YOU EXIST, SO I CAN TALK TO YOU INSTEAD OF GETTING A FUCKING THERAPIST.

Anyway, 'Killer Within' was unbelievably amazing. Like, seriously. Ten out of ten, simply for audacity and extreme - and deservedly titled - horror. One main character gets torn apart by hungry zombies quite explicitly and disturbingly, and another (three guesses who) is sliced open and has a TINY HUMAN RIPPED OUT OF THEM. And maybe Carol died, I don't know.

I took a half-hour break before writing this review simply because my hands were shaking too much to type. I checked twitter, looked up Sarah Wayne Callies to see if she was as traumatised as I was (only to find her death scene was her suggestion YOU SADISTIC BITCH), sat in extended dramatic pause mode and then stroked my dog for a few minutes. Emotionally draining? I FEEL PHYSICAL PAIN. THIS CANNOT BE LEGAL. I THINK I'M IN THE EARLY STAGES OF GRIEF, POSSIBLY NEARING CATATONIA.

OH GOD THE CAPS LOCK. IT JUST MAKES MY STATE OF MIND CLEARER, I.E. I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON ANYMORE.

Ok, was there anything bad about this episode? I mean, if I get my mind off the OHGODWHY parts I think I can clear my head. And no, there probably wasn't anything negative worth mentioning, unless the gory deaths of characters you like is a negative. In fact, it might be so negative it's a positive, as in so-bad-it's-good, like KFC. If you know me you'd probably expect me to call out the Woodbury-based scenes as significantly slower than the prison-set scenes, and while that's true I admit that when we flashed over to Andrea, Michonne, Merle and/or the Governor I was overcome with relief. It was like break-time at the office, and it felt long awaited and just as refreshing. Thank you, drama! It's a nice break from the horror. 

After Sophia last season, Lori's death by caesarean-section will go down as a defining moment of this boundless show, not just for it's almost cruel, tortuous outing but because it was actually fucking beautiful. Lori knew the second Maggie showed her that she was bleeding she wasn't going to make it out of this, and so rescuing the baby was the only real option left open. Imagine if Rick had to put down his own (well, maybe) child? His own (well, maybe) INFANT child? Thankfully this show isn't so intense that it lead to that, but we still lost the mother in the birthing process. 

I know Lori isn't (wasn't) the most popular character of all time, but she was amazing tonight, and her parting words to her grieving - but very composed - son were things of glory, with Callies and Chandler Riggs being wonderful in the undeniably overwhelming sequence. Lauren Cohen too, even if she didn't get to say too much at this point. There was almost peace in Lori though, and she was willing and happy to die to save her child's life, although I probably rather go out that way than like T-Dog. 

For him, he's at first bitten when he goes with Carol to close the gate that some inconsiderate soul has left carelessly open, allowing the walkers to leave their compound for a nice feast. It doesn't give him too much pause as it's just a nip on the shoulder, but it's immediately clear that time is nearly up for him. He decides to go on one last mission, with the aim of leading Carol back to the others and to safety. In the end though, since she runs out of ammo he has to sacrifice himself to get her past the final hurdle. We get the poor woman's point of view as she quickly turns back to watch her saviour having bits of his flesh being pulled from his body. ICK. JUST, ICK. HELLO, YET MORE ZOMBIE NIGHTMARES. Did you know that this is the ONLY FUCKING SHOW OR MOVIE that gives me nightmares? One time I did have a dream about Freddy Krueger, but I've never actually seen a Nightmare on Elm Street film so I can't put much stock in it. Anyway, I'm not overly frightened during the whole experience, nor does it keep me awake, but sometimes my brain likes to FUCK WITH the memories of the show and TURN THEM INTO MONSTROSITIES. THIS WILL NOT BE HARD TONIGHT.

T-Dog's fate is definitively confirmed - not that it was a mystery or anything - when the group, fresh from ending the life of the miscreant who caused all the trouble finds his bloodied and bare corpse seeping across the FLOOR OH GOD MY MIND IS DYING AGAIN.

Daryl also decides from a head scarf that Carol's dead as well, though that just may be optimism on his part. 

However, what was the best single moment of the episode came about at the very end, as the surviving group (sans Carol) reconvenes back in their yard, with Rick seeing Carl, Maggie and the baby emerging from the depths of the prison, no Lori in sight. Considering it had come down to the stoic and surprisingly strong Carl to deal the double-tap blow to his mother, Rick was disturbingly weak. I'm satisfied that he realised what had gone down pretty quickly, but in the end he says 'No' a lot then collapses on the ground. I'm not calling out Andrew Lincoln's performance... OK, maybe I am, but because it was FORMIDABLE. It was epic, and what would normally be over-the-top anguish was presented realistically because Lincoln FUCKING SOLD IT, and it was heart-breaking. He didn't even look at his new child, who a traumatised Maggie holds against Glenn's chest, and I can't blame him. There was just so much riding on Lori, and you know he feels somewhat responsible for them not reconciling, and now she's dead and he couldn't be there to help. 

There is something almost cathartic about death on this show. Perhaps the creators realised this, and are aware of the constant feeling of lingering doom which surrounds every character, because so far all the major deaths have been spine-tinglingly good; Amy, Sophia, Dale, Shane and now Lori and T-Dog. They understand that they need to step the death up a notch to help it transcend the death that already exists in the show, so whether it be horrifyingly violent and painful like T-Dog, or beautiful and emotional (if still horrifyingly violent) like Lori, they get how to do it right and have managed to do so consistently. 'Killer Within' is The Walking Dead at its absolute best, showing us that there really are casualties in this universe, and that the viewers can't watch this like any other show. Yeah, 24 or Lost or any other serial shit could theoretically pull off an 'anyone can die' routine, but their characters don't exist in a world where nearly everyone already has. This bleak, inevitable, unflattering end that awaits all our characters, beloved or not, is what makes this so difficult and so glorious to watch. We don't know what's going to happen. I didn't expect Lori to go out that way, and I didn't expect T-Dog to go out either. One moment changed everything from a normal episode which started with collecting firewood and bringing Hershel back out into the world into a violent and tearful goodbye to two, maybe three characters. Is there anything more that we can ask for?